Would You Rather?: Marriage vs Singleness

Would you rather is a fun game to play, particularly when getting to know someone. A person is asked to choose betwen two things of equal desiring—making it hard to decide and opening dialouge as to why the person chooses the option they choose. Recently I stumbled accross several versions of "Would You Rather?: Bible Edition" and found the questions quite intriguing. I've decided to answer one every Sabbath. Let me know your answer to today's "Would You Rather?" in the comment section.

Would you rather be single your whole life or married to an unfaithful spouse?

Answer: It's complicated

Backstory

Paul

Many of God's people never took a spouse, but Paul is perhaps the most famous. He even gives us reasons why singleness can be a good thing.[1]

Hosea/Christ

Hosea was called to married a prostitute—scholars debate whether he married a woman with a promiscuous past who was now faithful or if she remained promiscuous after their marriage. Either way, this marriage was symbolic of God's relationship with Israel and is symbolic of Christ's marriage to the Church. Both Israel and the Churhc struggle to be faithful to God.[2]

Rationale

This is a hard question for me because I have a "logical" answer and a "heart" answer. When I think about the question in it's totality, there are spiritual ramifications, and yet I feel like I would choose the one with negative spiritual consequences (singleness).

As Paul states in 1 Corinthians 7, there are benefits to being single. Most of the drawbacks are external. If you stay in community with your fellow believers, you should not be lonely and if you do not listen to the world's definition of success or happiness, you shouldn't feel incomplete without a spouse.

As someone who is single and has never been married, I am content in my current state and I don't think it would be "the end of the world" if I never married. This is why I lean toward this option.

I say to the unmarried[e] and to widows: It is good for them if they remain as I am.1 Corinthians 7:8 CSB

Many people in our society have experienced infidelity and based on conversations I've had with married people, I actually believe most couples work it out and remain married. Of course a one time slip up is very different than a serial cheater.

For this question, I imagine the relationship between Christ and the Church or God and Israel, where the spouse is continually breaking the covenant. In this case, of course pride drives me to think I wouldn't want that—if the other person doesn't respect the marriage covenant, why be married? On top of that, in our fallen world, such behavior can quickly get messy. From side babies and baby momma drama to incurable STIs/STDs, not being faithful can have consequences other than just hurt feelings!

The beginning of the word of the Lord by Hosea. And the Lord said to Hosea, Go, take unto thee a wife of whoredoms and children of whoredoms: for the land hath committed great whoredom, departing from the Lord. Hosea 1:2 KJV

Of course, the catch here is that God always takes us back. God loves us to the point that He's willing to take on whatever baggage we pick up in the world while we're out doing our own thing without Him. This is extremely profound from a spiritual perspective and exemplifies the meaning of true unconditional love.

There is a Bible verse that says forgive so that you can be forgiven (Luke 6:37) and by choosing remain single, I feel like I'm walking on thin ice... If I can't forgive a cheating spouse, why should I expect God to forgive me for all the things I've done? This is why it's complicated. I want to to choose be married to an unfaithful spouse, but in my heart I'm sure I would choose be single.

Which would you rather do?

References and Footnotes

1. 1 Corinthians 7
2. Hosea 1:2

Haunting Conversations

Conversations from times past
Replay in my mind—
Things I wish I'd said
Angrily spilling from my lips...
People I want to go back and shame
Blend with present people of less offense.
I try to let it go—
It's in the past and everyone has moved on;
But you never understood my anger
Expressed or unexpressed,
No conclusion was made, no treaty forged.
So I replay it in my mind—
Was I wrong? Was it you?
Why were things never resolved?
And this unfinished conversation lingers
Long after I've forgiven.

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Christina

Church Hurt

Church hurt turns a lot of people away from God when it's actually us that are the problem. In this episode, I want to talk about how "Christians" have turned people away from Christ because we don't follow the words of Christ.

PSALMS to God · Church Hurt

¹Then He said to the disciples, “It is impossible that no offenses should come, but woe to him through whom they do come! ²It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck, and he were thrown into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. ³Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. ⁴And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, ‘I repent,’ you shall forgive him.” Luke 17:1-4 NKJV

What is the difference between corporate church hurt and personal church hurt?
In this episode I talk about "corporate" and "personal" church hurt. When I say corporate church hurt I'm referring to things that apply to the institution of organized religion. These offsenses may not affect a person personally, but are issues with the religion as a whole. Personal church hurt occurs at a specific church between specific people.

Corporate Church Hurt Examples

• Racism -- Protestant "Christians" behaved outside of the word of God in their practices of slavery and murder of the indigenous population in America.[1]
• Sexism
• Sexual Assault/Pedophila

The issue is that people are claiming to be followers of God, but not living according to His Word and lying about His Word (re: all the images of Biblical figures as white people)

Admitting that you have angered someone is part of the process. Some times you have to pray to be compassionate and let God do the resolving of the situation.

Here are a few verses to meditate on:

• James 1:19-20
• Ephesians 4:2-3
• Romans 12:17-21
• John 13:34-35
• Proverbs 27:5-6
• Matthew 5:38-42
• Proverbs 19:11

"I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." -Gandhi[2]
The I Feel Statement—I feel _____ when you _____ and I would like you to _______.

References & Footnotes

1. In the episode, I called out Protestants because that's who shaped most of the US's history, but Catholicism has played a a role in spreading white supremacy as well.
2. Soutik Biswas. "Was Mahatma Gandhi a racist?". BBC News. September 17, 2015

Forgiveness & Reconciliation

I have a short temper, but one thing I do not do is hold grudges. I'm more likely to tell you exactly why I'm mad at you and then be over it. Obviously, if you do the same thing over and over it's going to affect our relationship, but even then I don't usually hang on to angry. Other people I know are still mad about the time in 1st grade when someone cut them in line. Many will never even verbalize their anger. Yet Christ gives us two pieces of information about dealing with conflict that apply to all of us, regardless of how we default in times of anger.

¹⁵Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. ¹⁶But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. ¹⁷And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an heathen man and a publican.Matthew 18:15-17 KJV

²³Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; ²⁴Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. ²⁵Agree with thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to the officer, and thou be cast into prison.Matthew 5:23-25 KJV

Last week, I woke up to a group chat message that I found highly offensive. I addressed the individual in what I thought was a calm manner, and they became defensive. It was a very short exchange, but in the end, the other person said they were "hurt" by what I said. This person did not care that they had hurt me and held no remorse for their part in the exchange, but per Christ's instructions the leaders of the church recommend that we "reconcile."

I'm Only Human

My first reaction was to become even angrier, to be honest. Imagine someone punches you, you respond by shoving them, and they respond by kicking you&mdahs;then they say you asaulted them and they're hurt. The flesh was like "Good! I hope you stay hurt." Unfortunately though, I'm at the point in my relationship with Christ where I know this isn't how to handle the situation. In responding to the message that originally caused offense, I sort of did Matthew 18:15—arguably because this was through text, the next conversation should probably still be one on one. Yet, because he has said that he is also hurt, I am also "at the alter [remembering] that my brother is angy with me." The two of us are doubly called to talk it out and attempt to be reconciled. The problem is, I'm not sorry for I said, and he's not sorry for what he said.

A Step of Humility

One of the hardest parts of forgiveness and reconciliation is admitting you are wrong. Whether we are wrong for what we said, how we said it, when we said it, who we said it to, or why said it, admitting that is hard. It's also hard to admit we blew something out of proportion or misjudged a person. In most situations we just want the other person to say "you were right and I was wrong." Meanwhile, they're thinking exactly the opposite. I've definitely grown in my ability to admit that I have overstepped a boundary, or gotten mad unnecessarily (PMS is real).

Unfortunately, the truth is, sometimes I think the person received exactly what they deserved. Maybe I didn't consciously say it to hurt the person, but even before I opened my mouth to speak, I decided what needed to be said was more important than hurt feelings. It is in those cases, such as the example we've been discussing, that I have no remorse for what happened and struggle the most with humility.

Questions to Ask Yourself

When i'm trying to bring myself into a state of humility, these are the questions I ask myself.

Was it necessary?

This question really should be asked on the front end of conversations, but if we're honest with ourselves, sometimes we say or do unnessary things. This is usually what gets us in trouble. When I answer this question truthfully, if the answer is no, it becomes easier to see the other person's point. This is essentially me admitting that overstepped a boundary. Even if what I said was true, it wasn't necessary and didn't benefit anyone.

Could I Have Handled It Better?

The answer to this question is almost always yes. It might take a day, or a month, or even years to able to answer it honestly, but the answer is almost always yes. I've often told people it's not what you said, but how you said it. The truth hurts sometimes, but that doesn't mean I should hurl it at you like a baseball. I have found that with delicate matters, every person reacts differently. As we get to know people, its important to remember who you're talking to. With some you may need to be more gentle. Many times we don't know that we've touched a nerve or we upset someone we don't know well. Stopping to think of alternative ways I could have handled a situation helps me to understand the person better, and sometime identify where things went wrong. This allows me to see from their perspective and is helpful in admitting my fault.

Was it the Right Time/Place?

We all know the meme "too soon." Sometimes it just isn't the right time to say something. Of course with somethings there is no right time, but at least there may be a right place. Things that may be ok to say between close friends or between family might not be ok to broadcast to your entire friend circle. Similiarly it could be one particular person that you said something in front of that irritates a person. Again, its one of those things we really should think about beforehand, but in the after effects, I find that acknowledging I embarassed someone or stole the spotlight, etc., is a crucial step in repentence.

Letting Go

It also takes humility to let things go. Pride is what makes us feel like someone owes us an apology or that we are deserving of something. It takes humility to say "I'm sorry" is enough. It takes even more humility to forgive without an "I'm sorry."

Repentance

During some of the rough conversations I had with members of my church in the past couple weeks, we talked alot about Christ's stance on forgiveness, but not alot about repentence. People often remind us that Christ died for our sins while we were still sinners as motiviation for forgiveness, but we aren't pardoned until we confess His name and repent. This is why humbling ourselves is so cruicial. We have to truly get to a place where we actually feel apologetic about what we have done and/or the pain we caused.

Reconcile

In my scenario, I feel like what I said was respectful, necessary, and done in the appropriate time/place. Am I sorry that the other person felt hurt in the process? Unfortunately the answer is no. A hit dog will holler. When we are confronted with out own biases, faults, and shortcommings, our reaction is often to be defensive and get offended. That's what I felt happened in the exchange. So how then do I go about reconciling with this person? When speaking with the leadership of the church about it, the person said reconciliation didn't mean apologizing. I'm not sure I agree with their assessment, especially since I've never had a conversation with this person otherwise.

What Does Reconcile Mean?

Reconciliation means "the restoration of friendly relations."[1] This implies that there was a friendly relationship in the begining. I find this point interesting because we often forget that when we talk about reconciliation in the context of Matthew 5 and Matthew 18, we're supposed to be talking about our brothers and sisters in Christ—those we actually have relationship with. You can not be restore friendly relations to someone you were simply neuteral about. Now, one could argue that in cases such as my own, reconciliation would mean to get back to that neutral.

Refusal of Reconciliation

We're not all on the same spiritual level. Some of us are moved by the Holy Spirit to reconcile, and some are not inclined to reconcile at all. Many (maybe even most) of us, are somewhere in between. Often I am aware that conversations should take place and I the desire to attempt reconciliation, but I may not be ready to budge. There will be times when people will refuse to listen or speak to you. Sometimes it will come to a stalemate.

Responsibility

I often ask God what our true responsibility is in reconciliation. Sometimes, conflict exists over the dumbest things (for a great example, see my podcast episode Misunderstandings). However, sometimes the conflict is legitimate. In Matthew 18, it even says that if after carrying the matter through propper channels the issue still exists, the person becomes as a stranger to you. It doesn't guarantee reconciliation. There are at least two points of contention I've been involved in where I feel as though I did the right thing—the example shared being one of them. In both cases the other person adamantly disagrees. At least one of them desires an admission of wrong doing and an apology, but you shouldn't apologize when you aren't apologetic. You cannot restore a friendly relationship if the person is waiting for you to apologize.

So I asked myself when is it ok to stand your ground, so to speak. When am I justified in not offering and apology? Am I ever justified to not accept an apology? (Colossians 3:13) Do we have to be "friendly" in the aftermath. Biblically, we don't ever see Christ back down from the Pharisees; He does not legitimize the fact that they feel threatened by His teachings or try to soothe their ego. Yet, in Luke 7 and Luke 14, Christ is also seen breaking bread with them. What does that mean for us?

Christ tells us to forgive our brothers and sisters 70*7 times. So, when a person approaches me for forgiveness, it's pretty obvious that I'm supposed to offer it. Being friendly with that person doesn't mean being naive though. For instance, if they stole money from me, apologize, and I forgive them, that doesn't mean I'm going to leave my wallet with you when I go to the bathroom. This, while difficult, is actually the easy side of reconciliation, because at the end of the day, we can only control our own actions. When the person is unresmoreful for their actions, we have to be able to let go of anger without an admission of wrongdoing. Similarly, when someone is angry at us, we can not force them to accept an apology and we cannot force them to see things our way. This is when things get complicated.

In situations of conflixt, my suggestion would be to first pray and surrender your heart to God. Let God humble you; His Spirit will tell you if you should be remorseful. Let God be the one to decide what you should say. If both people are truly in the Spirit, reconciliation will happen. If only one person is, it's hard to say what the outcome will be, but in these scenarios, I want to be the one that came in the Spirit so I can be blameless before God. In short, our responsibility is simply to try.

References

1. "Reconciled". Merriam-Webster. visited June 13, 2020

Most Popular Guy

Back in the day it was about popularity; now it's about being an "influencer." Which person from the Bible do you think embodies this, and what could we learn from him/her?

Season 1 Episode 11

²⁵Jesus called them over and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those in high positions act as tyrants over them. ²⁶It must not be like that among you. On the contrary, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, ²⁷and whoever wants to be first among you must be your slave; ²⁸just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”Matthew 20:25-28 CSB

00:01:26	Hey guys! Welcome back to the PSALMS to God podcast. So, today's superlative is "Most Popular Guy." I think that popularity is in the eye of the beholder, to be honest, but it's something that I feel like we've all dealt with. We've all probably desired. In hindsight, is kind of fuzzy on how to define popularity. Today's culture makes it a lot easier because you have things like Instagram, Twitter, Facebook. Social media makes it really easy to keep a count of how many people are following you, how many people liked your posts and your tweets and your thoughts and things. And so, it's really easy to quantify who is quote-unquote the coolest kid at the school, or who is the coolest person in your office, or amongst your friend group, or whatever, because that person may have tens of thousands of followers, and you may only have two.
00:02:35	And so, there's a much easier way to quantify, I guess, popularity, but at the same time, in today's society, people like things absent-mindedly. It doesn't mean they actually like the person, and people follow people absentmindedly. It doesn't—they can turn on people. We see this all the time, and cyberbullying is real. And so, I think that even still, you still kind of have this vagueness about what it means to be popular. And even then, there is the question of what traits do people have that give them this popularity.
00:03:28	To be real, I think the popularity and leadership kind of go hand-in-hand; they have some similarities to them, because the people who become the most popular are typically influencers. They're going to be the people that people are trying to imitate, that they are looking up to, that they're modeling themselves after. Whether that's a celebrity, whether that's somebody at school, whether that's your mentor at work, you're definitely going to try to imitate the people that you think are quote-unquote popular, or cool, or however you want to phrase it. And so there is a leadership aspect to that, as well. Because by nature of being well-received and well-liked, you also have the platform that allows you to lead, to shape, to mold people.
00:04:27	And in seeing that, I definitely wanted to look to the Bible for who I thought was the most popular, or the best leader&mdahs;I think they go hand-in-hand, as I said. And so given that, you probably can already guess who I would say, but I gave that superlative to David. King David is probably the most famous king of Israel, for multiple reasons—some of them good, some of them bad. But even to this day, if you look at the flag of Israel, it has the Star of David—we could probably do a whole 'nother podcast about the Star of David, 'cause I read some very interesting things about the Star of David—we're going to stay focused, and we're going to talk about the man David.
00:05:22	And so, like I said, probably the most famous king that Israel had, and I think that there are three specific traits that David shows that I think you would find in pretty much anybody in our society who is considered popular, well liked, well received, an influencer/celebrity, however you want to phrase that. I think these people would have these three traits, and I think that whether we are striving to be popular and have tons and tons of followers on social media or tons and tons of friends, or whether we moved on past that phase in our life, I think these three traits are still traits that we should be imitating and fulfilling as followers of Christ, because we are also called to be leaders and influencers, and basically ambassadors, for the kingdom of God.
00:06:31	So without further ado, the first trait is that of confidence or fearlessness. One of the first things that we learn about David is that even though he was too young to join the Army, and to go off to battle, he was still eager to play his part and to do his role or to be useful in the time of battle. So David goes, and I believe he takes food to his brothers. He takes something to his brothers.[2] When he gets there, he finds that everybody is sitting around scared to fight this giant named Goliath. And you know this could probably [be] embarrassing, because Israel is the great Israel. God is fighting their battles; they have come out of Egypt; they have taken the promised land; and now they're afraid to have a one-on-one battle instead of having a mass slaughter, because they don't actually believe that God will handle their battle.
00:07:38	But David volunteers to do this. He's not even old enough to be in the Army.[3] so per Israel's laws he had to have been less than 20. He's not necessarily described as a ginormous—I mean he was probably of decent stature for what we would consider today, but Goliath is a giant! We're not talking about taking on some guy the same size as you, the same weight... We're talking about this massive giant, and David's just like, "yeah I'll do it, let's go. I have full confidence that God has got this battle in His Hands, and that God has already won the victory. All I have to do is let God use me."
00:08:28	He was fearless. He was not afraid to take a risk. He wasn't worried about failing, and this is what we need in our life, everyday. We have so many decisions to make, and when we second guess what God is telling us to do, and when we second guess ourselves. we fall short. You know, if you don't give it a hundred and ten, if you don't give it your all, it's not going to work. You can't half do something and expect a great and grand result. An example is, if you wanted to start a business—you can't half invest in your business, and expect the business to take off. You have to go into it 100% fully committed, and that's scary because it's a risk. You don't know if it's going to succeed. But David knew that God had his back, and so he was not afraid. He had full confidence and no fear going into that battle, and that is why we remember him today.[4]
00:09:32	So the second trait that David has that I think we all need is humility. So fairly early in the narrative that we learn about David, we see that Samuel columns and anoints David to be the next king. Now, if somebody told me that I was about to be the new queen of the United States—we don't really operate like that, but pretend that we were and that we did and that being queen meant something—you know, you might start feeling a way about yourself. You might be like "I don't have to go to work. I don't have to put up with your foolishness. You know what? The first order of business when I become queen is to get rid of you, and you, and put you in jail. And to get you back for what you did." It's very easy for us to let those kinds of positions and powers dictate our actions and to corrupt us. You know what they say, "absolute power corrupts absolutely,"[5] and it's very easy to stray into that.
00:10:40	We see that just with Saul. Saul lost his mind, but David does not do that. David doesn't start boasting. He doesn't start bragging, and he doesn't start acting out, and above his station. In fact, David ends up as a servant to Saul and to Saul's family, and he serves them faithfully and loyally. In fact, when Saul freaks out and descends into madness, and even when Saul is trying to kill David, David does not retaliate and kill Saul. He basically just fleas to save his own life. He doesn't really fight back or push back. He still gives his loyalty to Saul as long as Saul is alive as king. He makes friends with Saul's kids, and like I said, he just acts like a humble person. And I think that's very important&mdashto remain humble and not to let success or fame, or whatever you have, to get in the way of being a decent person and treating everybody with respect and not getting ahead of yourself, is what I'm trying to say.
00:11:56	The final trait that I want to point out goes along with one of David's most famous acts, that you know, he probably wishes we would stop talking about because he did so many other things that were great, but we typically remember David by this one act that was not so great. And the third trait that I'm talking about is, being able to admit your mistakes and pay the consequences and make amends for your mistakes. So of course you know that the situation I'm talking about is that David committed adultery with Bathsheba. Not only did he commit adultery, but then he turned around and had her husband murdered. So obviously on the onset of the issue he didn't look up and say, "oh, I shouldn't have done this, let me repent right now."
00:12:52	He dug himself deeper in the hole, but after all was said and done David does repent of his deeds. And he realizes that he has done some very, very horrible things. It's a genuine repentance, and that's the key. It's not just a fake "oh well I'm sorry I got caught", it is a deep and genuine sorrow for doing something that you had no business doing. We all have a tendency to get caught up in the moment, and we all do things that we should not do. Hopefully, we're not out sleeping with other people spouses and then killing the spouse. That's...let's not do that! But, I think that if you dial down the severity a little bit, you can relate to what David did. In the moment, you know, I've definitely said some things or done some things that I probably shouldn't have done. And then when you get called out for it, you get defensive, and then you do some other things that you shouldn't have done, because it's in the moment; it's still raw, and you're hormonal or your, you know, your brain is just not working the way it should. And after you have some time to cool off and to think about it, you look back and you're like, "what was I thinking! I can't believe I did that. I am embarrassed. I don't deserve anything. Like I just feel so heavy with guilt and sorrow, and you have to take that to God and let God do the forgiving and then you have to forgive yourself.
00:14:35	But the thing is, when you're not popular, when you're not an influencer, when you're not a leader, it's a lot easier to do this in your closet, in your house, in your apartment wherever away from prying eyes. It's a lot easier to just deal with one person and be like "Look, I messed up, I shouldn't have cussed you out. I shouldn't have, you know, done this petty act or whatever," and just let it be between the two of you and God. But when you are in these types of positions, whether it's these celebrities, whether it's popular people Facebook on YouTube on Instagram, whether it's the CEO of a company, or you know somebody that's very popular at school, when all eyes are on you, your repentance is public as well. And you have to—not that it's right for us to judge somebody else, but the truth is in order to stay in that position, you have to convince other people that you are genuinely repentant of your actions, as well. And this ties back into being fearless being confident and being humble, because a lot of times it's pride that keeps us from admitting the truth. It's pride that keeps us from saying "I was wrong." It's Pride that keeps us from reaching out to make amends for something we've done. But David didn't let pride stand in the way of him reconciling with God, and that is the most important thing.
00:16:18	Once you realize that you've made a mistake, you can't go back and fix it. Even if it's&mdahs;like obviously if you kill somebody, you can't bring them back to life, but even if it's just, you said something you shouldn't have said or you know you did something less dramatic, you cannot change the fact that you did it. Even if it's like, say you stole a piece of gum out the candy bin at the gas station. You didn't get caught, so you go back and you put the gum back. OK, yeah no harm no foul, maybe. Maybe you won't go to jail. Maybe the person will never know, but the point is, God knows. You can't change the fact that you actually did that, and if you took a lie detector test and somebody asked had you ever stolen it was still waiver if you said no, because you did steal. Because you've already done it. We can't go back in the past and change things. What we can do is move forward and admit that that was wrong, and decide not to repeat that behavior.
00:17:26	So, I think that that's very important for anybody who's in a position of power, a of position of leadership, a position of influence, to be able to say "Hey I did this, and this was not a good thing to do. I don't know why I did it—or I do know why I did it. This is why I did it, but I should not have done it, and in the future I don't want to continue to do these things." That's the only way to really go about life, but I think that there's something very inspiring when we see people do that. When we see people lower themselves to the point that they can admit their faults, and then watching them rise above that is just a beautiful thing. So I definitely think that these three traits can be found in pretty much anybody you admire, anybody that you would consider popular. I think that they're found in people who are strong leaders and I think they should be found in all of us, as we profess to be followers of Christ, because Christ has called us to be leaders.
00:18:38	I've been reading The Purpose Driven Life with my young adult group at church, and so far, my favorite thing out of the book is a chapter where he talks about—he being Rick Warren, the author of Purpose Driven Life—he talks about the fact that we should think of ourselves as ambassadors to the kingdom of God, not a citizens of whatever country it is that we're in. And so, as ambassadors for the kingdom of God, our responsibility is to show the people who are native to whatever nation we're in—so Earth in general—what the kingdom of God is supposed to look like. So by definition, we're supposed to be influencers. We're supposed to be leaders. We're supposed to be quote-unquote popular—not in the sense of teen movies where everyone likes you, and you get to win homecoming king or queen, but in the sense that people know who you are. People know what you stand for, and people have a desire to be like you, because you're being like Christ and what they really want is to be like Christ!
00:20:01	So I think that as we go through our life and as we go through our day-to-day routines, we should look at our actions and our decisions, and see if we're being confident. Are we being fearless? Are we tackling each situation with the knowledge that God has already won the battle? Are we being humble, because God won the battle not us? And it is not behooving—or becoming—of anyone to be prideful. That's one of the first mistakes that we can make. It's definitely a downward spiral from there, so keeping that humility. And then of course, we will mess up, but when we mess up can we admit that we have done wrong? Can we repent? Can we make amends for it? And will we go about our fullest potential to make right what we have wronged. That is what kind of person David is, and that is what kind of person I hope to be, and I will be like that to.
00:21:09	Thank you guys for tuning in to another episode. Don't forget to subscribe. In the meantime you can check out the website and find the transcripts for this particular episode www.psalmstogod.com/mostpopularguy. See you next time.

Footnotes and References

1. 1 Samuel 17
2. 1 Samuel 17:16-18
3. Numbers 1:45
4. Well, that and Bathsheba, but I digress
5. This quote is from John Dalberg Acton

Psalms 51-55

This post covers Psalms 51-55, all of which were written by David.

Introduction

This post covers Psalms 51-55 from Book II of Psalms. I found myself diving a little deeper into these, so I split the post in half to keep it from getting too long. Looking at the circumstance of the each psalm really gave weight to the messages. Re-reading the passages to gather context was really meaningful, so I definitely suggest that for anyone reading through Psalms.

Psalm Summaries

Psalm 51

To the chief Musician, A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet came unto him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba

This psalm is one of repentance; written after Nathan the prophet confronts David about his affair with Bathsheba, it follows the events of 2 Samuel 11-12. Here, David confesses that He has sinned, recognizes that he cannot fix the situation, only God can, and begs for forgiveness. This psalm of David is highly relatable, even though most of us have never committed murder or adultery (I hope!). When we fail to resist temptation, no matter what it is, and are reminded by God that we belong to Him, David's word are exactly how we feel.

A few things stood out to me when I read this psalm.

Hyssop

In Psalm 51:7, David says "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean." If we aren't deep into the Word, it's easy to miss the depth of this statement. The first time hyssop is mentioned in the Bible is in Exodus 12:22 when the Israelites are being instructed to paint the door frame of their homes with the blood of the first passover lambs. Hyssop was what was used to accomplish this. Onward, in Leviticus and Numbers, hyssop is mentioned in conjunction with sacrifices. John 19:29 tells us the vinegar given to Jesus at the cross was given to Him via hyssop. Of the 12 verses in which the word hyssop appears, only 1 is not directly or indirectly related to sacrifice.[4]

As such, David bringing up hyssop in reference to becoming clean is extremely appropriate. From his point of view, hyssop has ties to the sacrifices which were used to wash away the Israelites' sin. Little did he know that today, this would have the same meaning in reference to the Messiah, who not only represents the passover lamb and causes us to be clean, but was fed with hyssop in the last moments of His life.

About the Heart

The biggest gripe God had with the Jews was the issue of legalism. Today, people confuse legalism with keeping the commandments, but the real problem was that the Jews relied on tradition over faith. Not only did the leaders of the Jewish community add laws on top of God's laws to insure the original laws weren't broken, but they were so focused on keeping the law, they forgot about God. Today, the closest analogy I see is the idea of going to church each week being the thing that makes someone a Christian. Without putting in the work to build a relationship with Christ, going to church is no different than going to work—going to church is not going to save you.

The Jews got to the point that they were sacrificing without necessarily repenting. It was something they had likely been taught, just as we are taught to go to church, and they simply did it out of habit. However, David is reminding us that God doesn't really want us to kill the animals. He would rather us surrender our hearts to Him. This statement is basically the opposite of the saying "it's better to ask for forgiveness than permission." I say basically, because God wants us to genuinely repent and ask for forgiveness when we mess up, so asking for forgiveness is not bad. However, we shouldn't be acting with the assumption that we can do whatever and then simply ask for forgiveness (re: offer a sacrifice) to cover it later.

Music

Shane & Shane have a song inspired by Psalm 51, called "Psalm 51 (Wisdom in the Secret Heart)"

Psalm 52

To the chief Musician, Maschil, A Psalm of David, when Doeg the Edomite came and told Saul, and said unto him, David is come to the house of Ahimelech.

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Rawpixel

Doeg, the Edomite, mentioned in heading of the psalm, is introduced in 1 Samuel 21:7, and further discussed in 1 Samuel 2. At this point in David's life, he had been anointed king, but Saul, the current king, had ordered him killed. So when David wrote this, he was a wanted man (like Jesus, Paul, and most of God's followers). As such you would think Psalm 52 would shed light on what it feels like to be wrongly persecuted. Instead, David gives us a glimpse of why people persecute us and how we should respond.

Watch Your Tongue

Proverbs already warned us to watch our tongue, but David continues to remind us here. What we say has consequences and the power of our words is much greater than we think. As such, we should always use our words for righteousness and shun evil.

Trust in the Lord

Many people trust in Earthly things, things that are tangible and in our control. People store food and money for emergency situations because it makes them feel prepared and in control. David warns us against trusting in money and wealth to get us through any situation, and reminds us that we will only prosper when our faith remains in God. Now, this isn't saying that when the weather channel announces a category 4 hurricane barreling toward your city you should do nothing to prepare. It's reminding us that even if we board up our house, stock up on batteries and non-perishable food, it's only God that can get us through the storm.

David was rightfully king at this point, and he had loyal supporters—even Saul's children were on David's side. However, David knew that God was in control. He trusted that if God had ordained him king, God would place him on the throne in the time and manner God saw fit. So instead of storming Saul's home and assassinating him, David simply stayed out of the way trusting God to fight the battle. In our life, we have to remember to turn our battles over to God!

Psalm 53

To the chief Musician upon Mahalath, Maschil, A Psalm of David.

A reproach for non-believers, much of Psalm 53 is repeated from Psalm 14. You can read my initial thoughts in that post.

Psalm 54

To the chief Musician on Neginoth, Maschil, A Psalm of David, when the Ziphims came and said to Saul, Doth not David hide himself with us?

This psalm discusses deliverance. We give freely to God because He has saved us in our troubles. He protects us from our enemies and uplifts us. The psalm is a powerful one to repeat in our times of trouble. Remember, David wrote this as he was being pursued by Saul, who was seeking to kill him.

Psalm 55

To the chief Musician on Neginoth, Maschil, A Psalm of David.

The words of his mouth were smoother than butter, but war was in his heart: his words were softer than oil, yet were they drawn swords. Psalms 55:21 KJV

This pslam touches on the depth of betrayal. When we are wronged by strangers, or people we know are against us, it is almost expected and we go on as usual. However, when we are hurt by those we consider friends or family, the sting of the action goes much deeper. The severing of trust and heartbreak of knowing that someone you thought you could count on is not actually in your corner can bring out depression-like feelings within us. David captures this beautifully in the psalm. Ultimately, he reminds us, all battles, even those among our brothers and sisters in Christ, must be given over to God.

Praying 3 Times a Day

This psalm also introduces the idea of praying morning, noon, and night. Growing up, I think I was taught to pray before bed (and of course blessing food before eating). Prayer is our time to talk with God, and communication is important in a relationship. So although it is important to pray, there's no set number of times or specific hours that we are required to pray, unlike in Islam where followers are required to pray 5 times a day.[5] However, I understand why David specifies these specific 3 times a day.

When you're dating someone (or married to them), isn't the first thing you do when you wake up telling them good morning? Everyone loves good morning texts, right? Knowing that you were the first thing on that person's mind when they awoke? Is it not the same at night before you go to bed? And throughout the day, aren't you bursting at the seams wanting to share your day or see how their day went? This is why God constantly compares our relationship with Him to that of a bride and groom. When we truly love God and are pursuing a relationship with Him, we can't wait to talk to Him.

Translation Changes

An interesting fact is that Psalm 55:17 actually reads "evening, morning, and noon" in Hebrew.[6] As given by God in Genesis 1:5, a day starts in darkness and finishes in light. Unlike today where we go from midnight to midnight (which really doesn't make much sense if you think about it), the Israelites' day starts and ends at sunset per God's definition. Thus, the first part of the day to David would be evening, followed by morning, and then by noon.

Messianic Verses

Psalm 55:12-14

In Psalm 55:12-14, David talks about being betrayed by a friend and brother in faith. Many draw parallels from this to the fact that Jesus was betrayed by Judas. I did not read it as a prophecy, but it is listed by some as a prophetic verse.[7]

The Meaning of Selah

Scholars are unsure what selah means; it appears frequently in Psalms and occasionally in Habbakuk, but no where else in the Bible. It is thought that the word was derived from Hebrew words meaning "to praise," "to lift up," and "to pause." Since the psalms are often prayers and songs, it is possible that selah was a musical instruction for performers.[2]

The Meaning of Maschil

The title of some of these psalms contain the hard-to-define word Maschil; it appears in the title of 13 psalms. Scholars aren't sure what the word means but believe it may be derived from a word that means "insight."[1] Many interpret it to mean "with understanding," while others believe it is a musical instrument or instruction.[3]

References

1. Holman Bible Publishers. Holman KJV Study Bible, pg. 938,940. 2014
2. "What does selah mean in the Bible?". GotQuestions.org; visited June 2017
3. "Maschil". Bible Hub; visited July 2017
4. "Bible Search: Hyssop". Bible Gateway; visited November 2018
5. "Five Pillars of Islam". Wikipedia; visited December 2018
6. "Psalm 55:17". Bible Hub; visited December 2018
7. "365 Messianic Prophecies". Bible Probe; visited December 2018

Forgiveness

I used to think I was good at forgiveness. One of the things that comforted me about my short temper was that at least once I've said what I need to say, I'm done with the situation. Over the years, I've had to work on (re: allow God to fix) what it is I say in these situations, but I've always been able to let go afterward. Near the beginning of the year, I realized that there were actually 3 grudges I held. All 3 are cases in which I bit my tongue and never expressed how I felt. This year, I've been working on letting go of these particular grudges; I've already succeeded with 1.

What the Bible Says About Forgiveness

One of the pastors at the church I attend has been doing a series of sermons on forgiveness, which has been extremely helpful in tackling this issue. We usually think of forgiveness as something we extend after someone apologizes for hurting us, but actually, forgiveness can and should be offered before the person apologizes. After all, Jesus died for our sins before many of us where even born.

Forgiveness is not Optional

Forgiveness is like exercise, we need to stretch and
do it constantly to stay in shape.
Photocredit: ShutterStock / Lee Torrens

One of the sermons the pastor did was entitled "If You're Not Forgiving, You're Not Forgiven." Think about it, if I can't forgive you for something minor, how am I to expect God to forgive me? Furthermore, if I think you are unworthy of forgiveness, is that not a judgment?

There are numerous places in the Bible where we are commanded to forgive (Luke 17:3-4, Matthew 18:21-22, Ephesians 4:31-32, and more). It seems almost unreasonable that Jesus tells the disciples we should forgive someone 70 times 7. In the context of the passage, it's safe to say that Jesus wasn't giving us a literal number to go by, but simply expressing that forgiveness is endless. One of the things that makes the Lord our God is that He is a forgiving God. This is a hard request to truly follow, but with the help of the Holy Spirit, we can learn to truly forgive the way God does.

²¹Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? ²²Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.Matthew 18:21-22 KJV

In our discussions about forgiveness at church, we always come back to the issue of setting ourselves up for failure. For instance, an abusive husband may apologize after every offense, but that doesn't mean the woman should stay and continue to let him abuse her. It's important for us to recognize that forgiveness is not about keeping our relationship with the person exactly the same. It means not harboring negative feelings about the person and not wishing harm on the person.

My Grudges

I decided that to help me loose these grudges, I needed to confess and refocus. Perhaps you've experienced similar situations and are also in search of a way to forgive, or may be you have pointers. Nonetheless, I plan to share with you a little about each grudge I've held in this post. In a follow up post I plan to detail how a shift in focus is helping me let go of the grudges and forgive the people who angered me.

An Institution

The shortest grudge I've been holding is actually directed toward an institution, not an individual person. The combined actions (or inactions) of people who represent this institution have caused me to develop an extreme distaste for the institution. Despite the institution being located midway between where my parents live and where I currently live, graduating from the institution, and having numerous friends who attended the institution later and still attend the institution or live in the area, I have never been back—not even for my own graduation. In the years right after I left, any time someone mentioned the institution I was quick to explain all the horrors I experienced there. I left angry, but I never resolved that anger.

Less than a month ago, a coworker who also attended that university noticed that I have tons of paraphernalia from the other two universities I attended but not a single item from this university. When he questioned it, I didn't go into a tirade, but I could feel in my heart that none of that animosity had dispersed. I may not have unleashed the detailed explanation of why I refused to buy anything with their logo, but it was all bubbling beneath the surface.

I vented pretty much the whole situation to a person who actually is working to actively change the culture of the institution. When that person confided in me that I wasn't crazy and that it was a known problem, it may have subsided my anger a little, but it didn't pacify me. Perhaps it's because most of the people who created those negative experiences are still there. Perhaps it's because I've never seen the changes this person has made. I don't know.

What I do know, is that the Bible is very specific about forgiveness of individuals. Although my grudge may not be with the particular people who caused my distress, they are intrinsically connected to the situation. I cannot explain why I'm angry with the institution without reflecting on them. I know that negativity is not something God would want me to hang on to. That's not to say that I should deck my car out in stickers supporting this institution or go from house to house singing their praise. However, I should be able to discuss the university without feeling anger, disgust, and animosity. So, in the follow up post, I'm going to reflect on the good that happened while I was there and the blessings that came from the experience.

The "Racist"

In high school, there was a guy in my class that said the worst things. If microaggressions had been a word I knew back then, that's how I would have described his speech. He seemed to hate blacks, Hispanics, poor people, non-protestants, etc. He always had something rude to say, but I learned quickly that he enjoyed the argument and unfortunately, he was like Trump; you couldn't actually have a logical conversation with him. So, in a combination of pettiness and mere desire to simply get out with as much sanity as possible, I purposefully refused to debate him. I wouldn't take the bait or respond to his foolishness because I knew it ate him up that he couldn't express more of his ideas.

At the beginning of the year, he commented on my Facebook post with some foolishness in reference to "the flag protests"—sigh, it's not a protest of the flag people!—and I lost it. Although the comment I left in response wasn't particularly scathing, it was direct, straight to the point, and a little too harsh. To my surprise, he was confused. After the confrontation, I realized that I shouldn't have responded quite the way I did and sent him a Facebook message both explaining my anger and apologizing for the way I expressed it. Again, to my surprise, he actually apologized for his behavior in high school, explaining that he had grown a lot since then and though he couldn't remember specific details, I was right about his behavior then. He still doesn't understand #BlackLivesMatter or the fact that protesting police brutality by kneeling during the national anthem is not a protest of the country or the flag, but I walked away from the conversation with a neutral opinion about him. (It probably helped to find out that he did not vote for Donald Trump.)

This situation was actually a major player in my decision to work on letting go of the few grudges I do still have.

The Church

The last and oldest grudge I've held, once again, is not toward a specific person, but a group of people. That grudge was to the church I grew up in. If you've read many of my posts, you already know the story behind that.

This is the weirdest one because when I stopped to really think about it, I really love the people at that church. It just goes to show how a few dark moments can overshadow a lifetime of good. Luckily, that also made it easy to move past those moments that really tainted my view of that church. I still don't agree with everything they do or some of the doctrines they teach, but those are not personal disputes. When I sat and thought about the good that was accomplished by this group of people, the community that was created, and the values they instilled in me, I quickly realized I was focused on the wrong things. These realizations will also be in the follow up post.

Focusing on the wrong thing really might be the root of most anger and grudges.

Helping Others Let Go

God gives us plenty of examples of forgiveness in action and He explicitly commands us to follow His lead in forgiving our fellow humans. Forgiveness is a true act of love, and until we understand love, we can never offer true forgiveness. I'm really working to cultivate this area in my life. One of the things I realized is that who you surround yourself with also makes a big difference in how well you are able to forgive. Our friends and family are usually the first people we vent to in times of distress. Because they love us, they often pick up our grudges as their own. We dislike people because they hurt our friends, and we get angry about the situations too. So, when the topic comes up, we enable and promote their grudge. For instance, if you bring up the institution I mentioned earlier to my parents, they too will become angry and have negative things to say about the people/institution. This doesn't help me to move forward.

As friends and family, we have to remind ourselves when we are getting upset on behalf of other people, and we have to remind ourselves that our reactions should be Spirit-filled. By all means, we should advise our friends to get out of dangerous situations, but we should not feed into their anger nor should would bring up the past knowing that it will provoke anger. Our responsibility as their brother or sister in Christ and as their friend, is to help them heal.

Isaiah 6: A Glimpse of Angels

Isaiah 6 is one those books that when you read it, then take a minute to ponder it, you're awestruck by how powerful it is. Isaiah is blessed with a vision of God's throne and the angels who serve there. He is given a message to take back to the Israelites that may be just as resounding with us today as it should have been for them back then.

Introduction

In Isaiah 6, Isaiah is brought before the throne of God, in which we get a glimpse of God's Heavenly home and His angels. Can you imagine experiencing this!? It had to be a life changing event. Isaiah tells us it occurred the year Uzziah died, which was near the beginning of his career (Isaiah 1:1). If something that amazing was how your career as a prophet kicked off, can you imagine what else God would show you?

Angels of God

Isaiah paints a picture of God seated on a throne in some sort of flowing garment that filled the Heavenly Temple. Above this throne are angels called Seraphim. I love this passage because it reminds me of how much we allow non-Biblical ideas to seep into our beliefs. If you go to many churches or Christian homes, they have depicts of angels that resemble humans with wings and halos. There are plenty of movies in which angels are required to perform some duty to "get their wings," which has become some sort of folk lore. Not to mention halos are actually relics of pagan sun worship.[11][12] You'll notice that while the angels do have wings, they don't really fit the description of what we see painted in renaissance art.

Description

While no one can contest that angles are able to shapeshift into humans (evidenced in Genesis 18 and 19 when angels disguised as men visit Abraham and Lot), Isaiah 5 gives us a look at one type of angel (Seraphim) in their natural state. Each Seraph is described has having 6 wings, not just two. What's interesting is that the wings have purposes other than flying. One set of wings was used to shield the eyes, possibly to signify that they were unworthy to look at the glory of God. Remember Paul had trouble with his eyes until his death after witnessing the brilliance of Jesus (Acts 9:1-9). Another set was used to cover the Seraph's feet. The final set of wings is the one actually used to fly over the King's throne.

, Isaiah doesn't tell us what the angel's faces look like, or much else about the angels for that matter, probably because they are covered by their wings. depending on the size of these wings, the effort to cover the eyes and feet likely covered most of the body.

Descriptions of Cherubim, the other type of angels mentioned in the Bible, are also given in Ezekiel and Revelation. Really, we aren't told much about angels in the Bible, which explains why people people have made up their own mythology about them (reminder, this is dangerous, we should stick to the facts of the Bible).

In the Book of Enoch

Isaiah is the only one who describes the Seraphim in our Bible, but apparently there are also descriptions in The Book of Enoch (which I have not read). Although some Jews consider The Book of Enoch a valid document, it isn't even part of the Christian Apocrypha. Most scholars consider it to be falsely attributed to Enoch, the man God took to heaven without experiencing death. Others, however, believe it is a historical document with both fact and fiction contained in it. Still, there are some who believe it is genuine revelation from God and thus study it as the Word of God.

Those who believe the book of Enoch is inspired by God often cite Jude 1:14 as proof. In that verse, Jude appears to be quoting a prophecy given by Enoch. Although the verse doesn't specifically mention a book or the prophecy being written, sources suggest the passage is similar to one found in the Book of Enoch. The verse in question is Enoch 1:9.[4] Opposers argue that Jude could be verifying a portion of the book to be true without canonizing the whole book. We'll go deeper into this when I get to Jude (which may take a while, unfortunately), but in the mean time I've provided a few references on this issue below (note I don't necessarily agree with each reference, I'm just providing a multiple perspectives upfront).[3][5][6] I just want to make you aware of where the book stands (as non-canonical) before talking about it's description of Seraphim.

Enoch 71:7 makes the claim that there are 3 types of angels, with Seraphim listed as one of the three.[8] The Bible only mentions Seraphim and Cherubim. Since I have not read the Book of Enoch, I cannot say exactly what the book says about Seraphim, however, sources suggest it provides more information. Much of the theology about angels comes from this book, despite its questionable authenticity.

Meaning

Seraphim is the plural of Seraph (i.e., the equivalent of people versus person), and Seraph means "fiery one."[1][2] Seraph may also mean serpent, suggesting that the serpent who spoke to Eve in the garden was a Seraph. If so, it would follow that the devil is a fallen Seraph. In Isaiah, we see the Seraphim above the throne of God, furthering the Bible's description of Satan has a highly ranked angel before his fall.[9][10]

Holy, Holy, Holy

If you attend church regularly, I'm sure you've sung the song "Holy, Holy, Holy" or some version of it. This phrase appears often in worship, and it was inspired by the praise offered to God by the Seraphim in Isaiah 6:3. Most Christians believe that holy is spoken each time to represent one member of the Godhead, thus God is thrice holy. Others believe it is merely repeated to produce emphasis.

Cleansing & Purification

Before one can start serving in the name of God, they should be purified. If you remember from the Books of Law, there were statutes put on the priests that they should not perform priestly duties while in an unclean state. In the New Testament, we see Paul go through a purification ritual in Acts 21. Many times, before we can work for God, we have to take a minute to fix ourselves. This isn't just for new believers, but even those of use who have believed for long periods of time. Regardless of where we are in our walk with Christ, we have sinned and fallen short of God's perfect righteousness.

When Isaiah saw the glory of God, he became acutely aware of this fact. Can you imagine? If God whisked you up to His throne right now, and you were standing before Him, would you not feel unclean and naked? Much like Adam and Eve—and now Isaiah—we would have the desire to hide from His perfectness in embarrassment of our own faults.

Unclean Lips

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Armando Ascorve Morales

Isaiah confesses his unworthiness by proclaiming that he is a man of "unclean lips" from a people with "unclean lips." Many of us can relate to Isaiah's dilemma; we say things we know are not of God. Perhaps it was fowl language or promotion of unholy thoughts and ideas, we know we shouldn't have said these things. Isaiah doesn't just stop with his own lips, though, he mentions the people of Israel as well. He recognized that even though they were the chosen people of God, they had drifted astray and were not in a position of righteousness. Here, Isaiah is pointing out that he is not better than his fellow Israelites—he was just as sinful as they were.

When I first read this passage, I speculated that the specific reference to unclean lips versus an unclean body had to do with blasphemy and/or idolatry. The Israelites had a long history of worshipping pagan gods, at which point their words and actions would have blasphemed God. It is possible that at some earlier point in Isaiah's life, he too had fallen to the temptation of idolatry. Can you imagine being seated before the throne of God knowing you had said something to diminish Him? As I mentioned, this is pure speculation on my part, but I definitely think it adds a layer of severity to the scene which helps us think about our own behavior and what is to come.

Repentance

Nonetheless, nothing we have done can keep us from God if we let Him clean us. When Isaiah admits to his faults, one of the Seraphim cleanses his lips with a hot coal from God's altar. Immediately, the sin is purged. The three steps in Isaiah's purification reveal three steps to repentance.

First, Isaiah admitted to his sin. We cannot repent if we never admit that we are wrong. The first step in repentance is always our admission of wrong doing to the Father. We must fight the urge to bottle it up and hide it away as though we could ever hide anything from God. Instead, we lay it all out before him and confess our unworthiness.

Second, the angel burned away the sin with a live coal. There are two revelations in this: the cleansing must be done by God, and we may experience discomfort for a moment. Isaiah was unable to cleanse himself, because as sinners we don't have that power. Instead, the angel, a representative of God, took something holy and performed the purification. Note also, that by using a live coal to cleanse Isaiah, this purification parallels the act of passing a sin offering through the fire (Malachi 3:2-3). Revealing our deepest, darkest secrets is scary. Not only does it reveal weaknesses and insecurities that live within us, it usually comes with some type of consequence. The whole reason we want to hide certain things is because we're afraid of what people will say or do when they find out. The consequences we have to live with because of our sins sometimes arise right after we confess.

Third, the sin is forgiven. Once we have admitted our sin and allowed the sin to be purged by God and His angels, we are forgiven. Many times, we dwell on the past and circle back to the things we should have let go. The angel tells Isaiah the sin is gone, not just for the moment or for the week, but forever.

Volunteering to Do the Will of God

Also I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here am I; send me.Isaiah 6:8 KJV

God waits for the moment when Isaiah has been purified to ask for a volunteer to deliver a message to the Israelites. God is King of all things, how easy would it have been to say "Isaiah you will deliver this message" or assign the task to one of the angels? Instead, He demonstrates our free will by merely asking for a volunteer.

We'd all like to think that when God calls we will respond the way Isaiah does. How powerful it is to be able to say "here I am, Lord send me" without hesitation or fear.

A Message Not Meant to be Heard?

Isaiah 6:9-10 almost sounds like God didn't want Israel to receive the message. However, I think the telling part of the message comes at the end of verse ten where God says they will be healed if they understood the message. We often put off approaching God because we feel like we're too far gone and unsavable. Here, God is saying that if the people repent before the appointed time they will be healed and avoid the judgment! It's not too late until the final moment. Right after God makes this statement, Isaiah asks "how long?" proving that he understood the message in this same manner. Isaiah is asking how long they have to correct their ways and heal the nation.

During Isaiah's time, there were several big moments yet to come for Israel. The judgment spoken of here could refer to the Israelites being taken into captivity or it could refer to the actual end of times. Today, we have two events we can assign this warning to: our death and judgement day. We have until judgement day or our own death (whichever comes first) to heed God's message. If we repent and follow Him before the time is up, we too will be healed. Like Isaiah, we often wonder how long that truly is. Both God, here in Isaiah, and Jesus, in the New Testament, only give signs to identify the time is at hand. Neither give an exact date or hour. If they did, I'm sure people would wallow in sin until the very last moment before repenting just in the knick of time. Instead we should heed God's Word as soon as possible and not procrastinate.

A Remnant

God tells Isaiah that a tenth of the people will survive. This leans toward the interpretation that God is talking about captivity, since this tenth is to return. It is also possible that only a tenth of all humanity will be saved during the judgment, but most commentaries I've read attribute this to those who returned from captivity. What I love the most about this, regardless of which judgement it refers to, is that before God enacts something, He always gives us the good news to hope for. Before He cursed Adam and Eve, He prophesied Jesus. Before He sent the flood, He prepared Noah. Before He sent the Israelites into captivity (in Egypt and in Babylon), He prophesied deliverance and a return home. Before He brings the final judgment, He prophesied that we can be saved. We always have hope.

References

1. "Seraphim". Bible Study Tools; visited March 2018
2. Emil G. Hirsch and Immanuel Benzinger. "Seraphim". Jewish Encyclopedia. 1906
3. Wayne Jackson. "Did Jude Quote from the Book of Enoch?". Christian Courier; visited March 2018
4. Enoch 1
5. "What is the book of Enoch and should it be in the Bible?". GotQuestions.org; visited March 2018
6. (Jude 9, 14-15) Why does Jude quote the Assumption of Moses (v.9) and the Book of Enoch (v.14-15)?". Evidence Unseen; visited March 2018
7. Enoch 71
8. Moe. Seraphim: The Burning Angels of the Serpent". Gnostic Warrior. March 20, 2014
9. Ángel Manuel Rodríguez. "Serpents and Seraphim". Biblical Research Institute; visited March 2018
10. "Halo". Encyclopædia Britannica. November 29, 2007
11. "What does the Bible say about halos?". GotQuestions.org; visited March 2018

Adultery: What Would Jesus Do?

So, it's official: Jay-Z cheated on Beyoncé. We already knew this, but we didn't know this until Jay-Z confirmed it in his interview with the NY Times. Hearing the confirmation that Jay-Z did in fact cheat on Beyoncé made me stop to think about cheating—or what the Bible refers to as adultery—in a general sense. As I pondered the issue this past week, I started thinking on all the complexities and went searching for a Biblical answer. I'm not here to speculate on or judge their situation. However I do want to talk about the general question of staying versus leaving after cheating has occurred. As you'll see, this isn't a post on what people should do, just some thoughts I had has I pondered the question and read people's two cents about Beyoncé's decision online.

Introduction

So, it's official: Jay-Z cheated on Beyoncé. We already knew this, but we didn't know this until Jay-Z confirmed it in his interview with the NY Times.^[1] Pretty much every entertainment media outlet there is has reported on it, though I haven't really seen as much about it on social media (of course, I'm not that big on social media, so I might have just missed it). Despite not being a fan of either artist, I already knew about the elevator incident,^[2] the implications of Beyoncé's album, Lemonade, and the implications of Jay-Z's responding album, 4:44. I can't imagine having such personal details about my life on display for the world to see...

Hearing the confirmation that Jay-Z did in fact cheat on Beyoncé made me stop to think about cheating—or what the Bible refers to as adultery—in a general sense. It's not that I've never thought about the issue; it's just that I've never thought about it from an adult perspective. As I pondered the issue this past week, I started thinking on all the complexities and went searching for a Biblical answer. Naturally, I felt compelled to share some of my thoughts.
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Anybody Can Be a Victim

The first thing that really caught my attention on the topic was the fact that people were saying "if Beyoncé can't keep a man from cheating, what hope do the rest of us have." Not only does the statement show how much we idolize people, it proves we don't really understand much about relationships.

Since the majority of us have never had a conversation with Beyoncé, we really don't know what she's like as a person. We don't really know what Jay-Z is like as person either. The reason people are shocked that someone would cheat on Beyoncé is not because they've kicked it with her and know she's a great person to be around, but because she's considered one of the sexiest women in the celebrity world and she's successful career-wise. Guess what, lots of gorgeous and successful celebrities have been cheated on: Halle Berry, Eva Longoria, Justin Timerblake, Jennifer Anniston, etc. Looks are not what makes a relationship successful. Compatibility, trust, communication, and compromise are the major players in any relationship. There are plenty of average looking people who have never been cheated on!

It also bothered me that the blame was some how placed on Beyoncé. Most of the sentences expressing the sentiment that if Beyoncé was getting cheated on, the rest of us were doomed, focused on Beyoncé. Whether Beyoncé is actually a diva who throws tantrums and acts like a brat or as sweet as can be, it was Jay-Z who made the decision the step out on her. Whether he believed he had reason or not, it was his decision to place himself in a compromising situation and that's all on him. Why don't people assume there's problems with the man when these sorts of things happen? After all, Jay-Z basically admits that he had problems within himself that had nothing to do with Beyoncé...

Would You Take Him Back?

But that's enough about them specifically. Like I said, I can't imagine having my personal business out there like that, so I'm not here to speculate on or judge their situation. However I do want to talk about the general question of staying versus leaving after cheating has occurred. As you'll see, this isn't a post on what people should do, just some thoughts I had has I pondered the question and read people's two cents about Beyoncé's decision online.

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Soroush Karimi

Some people say once a cheater, always a cheater, so you should leave. Others say you should do everything in your power to fight for your marriage. If you're of dating age, I'm sure you've thought about this even if you haven't been cheated on and posed a hypothetical answer. The first time I ever thought about this, I was in high school and I was team "once a cheater, always a cheater." By my early twenties, I at least knew there was a difference between emotional cheating versus physical cheating, but I was still convinced if I found out my hypothetical husband cheated, we were over. Now that I'm approaching 30, my view has become a little more moderate.

What's the Situation?

Every instance of cheating is a different situation. It could be a couple that's been married for 30 years, or a couple that's only been married 5 months. It could be a couple that has children together or a couple that doesn't have any children. Those children could be very young, teenagers, or out of the house. On top of that, it could have been purely physical or it could be emotional... People may decide to work it out for various reasons, and older me has realized, the decision may not be made simply based on what's best for the spouse who was cheated on, but based on the good of the children as well.

What's Biblical?

One of the reasons I had such a hardline stance on cheating in my teenage years and early twenties is because 1) I could only think in terms of boyfriends (I still believe a cheating boyfriend should automatically become an ex) and 2) the Bible is quite clear about adultery. Not committing adultery is one of the Ten Commandments for crying out loud! Plus, it's the only reason the Bible gives as an acceptable reason for divorce.

Interestingly, the Bible does not give us permission to divorce an abusive spouse. I would think physical and emotional abuse were more problematic than adultery. I've heard many people who've renounced their faith cite this interpretation of the Bible as one of those reasons. However, I believe that adultery isn't just physical and this is actually included in adultery.

Spiritual Meaning

Today, we really only talk about adultery as it relates to cheating in earthly relationships. However, the Bible often uses adultery to reference idolatry. God's people are often accused of committing whoredom and adultery when they turn away from God. Jesus said the following:

And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.Matthew 19:9 KJV

In John's prophecy about the end of time, he says:

So he carried me away in the spirit into the wilderness: and I saw a woman sit upon a scarlet coloured beast, full of names of blasphemy, having seven heads and ten horns. And the woman was arrayed in purple and scarlet colour, and decked with gold and precious stones and pearls, having a golden cup in her hand full of abominations and filthiness of her fornication: And upon her forehead was a name written, Mystery, Babylon the Great, the Mother of harlots and abominations of the earth.Revelation 17:3-5 KJV

Notice the similarities? The woman is filthy because she committed "fornication," just as the only way a divorce was permitted was in the case of "fornication." We generally translate fornication to sex, but the spiritual connotation in Revelation proves it isn't just referring to sex. James 4:4 and Mark 8:38 also refer to God's people as adulterous, suggesting we commit adultery with "the world." We cannot have sex with "the world," nor are these verses referring to people literally cheating on their spouses. These verses are referencing the people breaking the covenant we have with God!

Throughout the Bible, God uses a woman to symbolize His people; the most common example is the Bride of Christ. When the Israelites and the church are accused of fornication (or whoredom), it isn't because they've had sex with someone but because they broke the covenant. Here we see that simply breaking the covenant is grounds for adultery. In most weddings I've been to, the words "love" and "cherish" have appeared in the vows.^[3] I don't consider abuse loving or cherishing but I digress, that isn't the point of this post. My point is that adultery is much more than sex outside of marriage and has a spiritual parallel.

Forgiveness

Have you ever committed spiritual adultery? Since spiritual adultery is breaking the covenant, whether something major like bowing to a pagan god or as tiny as a little white lie, we've all sinned—thus, we've all committed adultery. Yet, God hasn't quite divorced us. Imagine if God divorced the church the first time we committed adultery! There would be no salvation if this was the case.

What's interesting, however, is what it enables God to do. Jesus tells us to forgive our neighbor and often encourages us to think of it from the perspective of God forgiving us. Basically, I'm not perfect and I want God's forgiveness, which He gives. Since this is the model, I should be willing to forgive those who come to me in earnest for forgiveness. God forgives us time and time again until it's too late. When judgement arrives, those who have not chosen God will be divorced because they didn't keep the covenant (God is upholding His own law). Those who are divorced will be thrown in the lake of fire. God is waiting to the very last moment to expel the adulterers from His kingdom. At the end of time (or the end of our life, whichever comes first), if we haven't repented of our adultery, God will divorce us. So, while it's true that ultimately, God will not maintain His relationship with adulterers, we have to remember that at some point we all sin, which means we all commit adultery against God. With true repentance, He gives us another chance.

Conclusion

The human in me still doesn't think I could forgive someone for cheating—especially in a situation as public as Jay-Z and Beyoncé's; pride would definitely have me feeling some type of way. However, when I think about the forgiveness Jesus extends to us for essentially the same offense, I figure, there has to be a way to move on if both parties are willing. Ultimately, I respect whatever decision a couple makes for their relationship and I hope I, nor you, ever have to make these kinds decisions.

References

1. Dean Baquet. "Jay-z Interview". New York Times. November 29, 2017
2. Stephanie Petit. "JAY-Z and Solange’s Infamous Elevator Fight: Everything They — and Beyoncé — Have Said". People Magazine. August 22, 2017
3. "Traditional Wedding Vows". My Wedding Vows; visited December 6, 2016
4. Al Maxey. "What is Adultery In The Bible?". Grace Centered Magazine; visited December 6, 2017