Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Slave Ancestry

The last day of Black History Month, on this special leap day.😃 If you know me well, you know I'm kinda obsessed with back tracing my family history. Its not very hard to see the tree branching out, but getting back beyond the great-great grandparents is difficult; not just for me, but for Black families in general. I mean, when your ancestors were denied birth certificates, counted as property instead of people, and denied education, it's kinda hard to piece together who's who. Aparently, my dad tried this as well and since he was around when the people who would know something were still young enough to know they knew something; he got pretty far. He found ancestor named Sarah Kocumba (the name Sarah making it's way down to my aunt, and the name Kocumba—nah I have no idea how it's supposed to be spelled—making its way to my pen name) way way back. He also found my great x 3-grandfather: Suffrin—as in "suffering," as in life was so bad there was suffering and my great x 4-grandmother forsaw more suffering and named her son as such. #SlaveNames I guess it's good that we've come so far from that type of atrocity, otherwise I'd have to name my child...I don't know...Breathless.^[1] #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount #SayTheirNames #Suffrin

Photocredit: ShutterStock/JAWIJAY

References

1. Terry Gross. "'I Can't Breathe' Examines Modern Policing And The Life And Death Of Eric Garner". NPR. October 23, 2017

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Black Fathers

Today in Black History: We often talk a lot about moms; they are the backbone of our community. We have songs like Dear Mama - Tupac and A Song for Mama - Boyz II Men, which uplift the role of mothers, but no one talks about dads. While there are definitely those who grew up without a dad, there are many Black men nailing the role of dad. I already mentioned my dad, and mentioned my older cousins who are now fathers. But I wanted to take a minute to shout out the dad's who are out being great dads! RaSha'd Colbert, Christan Grant, Jermany Parson to name a few. I know there are more of you out there. As a daddy's girl myself, I know that there is nothing that replaces the bond of a father. During slavery, Black families were torn apart so we don't generally follow "normal" familial structures. Having both a father-figure and mother-figure are important as you grow up. Some of us grow up with our birth father, some have a step-dad, others have uncles, grandfathers, next-door neighbors. It takes a village to raise a child, that's what's always made our community strong. Of course nothing replaces a dad; so hats off to the dads out there. #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount #DadsForTheWin

Photocredit: ShutterStock.com/Flashon Studio

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Mentoring and Expectations

In Black History today: Sorry I've been gone a few days---hectic schedule. Today I want to talk about perspective and exposure as they relate to opportunity. One of the most shocking moments to occur for me was my just before my senior year of high school. I was working at the water park with several others and we were having a convo on what we were going to do after high school. I said I was going to college and get a job, that I would be somewhere else. One of the girls thought I was crazy; she remarked that it was harder than it sounded and unlikely that I would move out of my parents' house. I had never contemplated that thought that I wouldn't go to college or that after 18 I would live with my parents. That's not how I was raised. Interestingly, since graduating the longest time I've spent home was the 3 month of summer after my freshman year of college; since then 2 or 3 weeks in December is the most time I'm home.

But she was right, a lot of my peers do still live at home. Some went to college and are being hounded by Sallie Mae (that struggle is too real) others are trying to find the right path for them before jumping out of the nest. What I learned and am trying to convey is that what you are exposed to as child deeply shapes your perspective and thus your ambitions in the world. If everyone around you is surviving pay check to pay check, you it may never occur to you to go to college let alone graduate school. Or it may occur to you but you don't know how. When I told a friend I was working on a PhD in computer science, he thought it was overkill since I don't want to be a professor. His exact remark was that I would be working for people who only had a BS and was wasting my time. Yet as I scroll through the job listings for companies I want to work for most of them require at least a Master, some a PhD. His perspective is local---you probably don't need a PhD for 90% of the jobs in SC---but my perspective was that I didn't want to be in SC. These little differences have a way of shaping our paths, which is why its important to have diverse perspectives around you when you're young. Its just as important to know that if you don't make it to college that doesn't mean you're a failure as it is to know that you can go to college. This is why mentorship is so important in our community.

The media would have you believing in all kinds of foolishness about what it means to be Black, but we need to show our youth the opportunities that are abundant for them. I know most of the Divine 9 (Black Greek Letter Organizations) sponsor mentorship programs in the community. Mentorships like these are what keep kids out of the street. I also know that people like VeeAnder Mealing, Sherwin Williams, and Freddy Paige have been active in mentoring college freshmen. These mentorships have been cited in studies as the driving force in increasing the number of Black Masters and PhD recipients. Why is that important? Because the more PhDs we have in the community means the more $$$$ we have in the community. #MakeItCount #BlackHistory2016

Photocredit: ShutterStock.com/Samuel Borges

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: The Kentucky Derby

Today in Black History: If you're from SC, chances are you've heard of Carolina Cup. It was really popular among my white friends, not so much amongst my black friends. For those of you not familiar with it, it's horse race. Most people probably don't think much about horse racing but it used to be (and probably still is in some circles) a really big deal. Interestingly, my great-grandfather--Edison Gaines--was a horse trainer. His horse, King Clover placed 13th in the Kentucky Derby of 1951. Almost every list I find spotlighting Black horse trainers lists him, which is pretty cool--I can't imagine it was an easy task to 1) become a horse trainer, 2) acquire a horse worth training, or 3) convince the Kentucky derby to let you race said horse in the race during his era. I didn't get to meet my great-grandfather, but no one can deny that some things are just passed down by blood. By the time I was 7 or 8 I was begging my parents for a horse (not a pony, a real horse...specifically, I wanted a black horse like Tornado from Zorro). While the only thing I may have trained my horse to do is come to the door of the barn where the treats are stored (I have a habit of giving her a treat each time I visit home), I definitely feel the draw to horses. I've never been to Cup; it never seemed like something I should go to (re: I would probably be one of very very few Black people there) but like many aspects of American culture, Black people have been active in and shaping horse racing for a long time--since the very beginning actually. I think it's important to know just how far reaching our presence has been in American culture and to appreciate the range of interests and talents that come out of our community. Who knows, maybe one day I will attend a horse race.

(from left to right)My great-uncle Bill, grandfather George Gaines,
great-grandfather Edison Gaines, and Bosh Hammond (the horse owner)

References

1. Christopher Klein. "The Kentucky Derby’s Forgotten Black Jockeys". History. May 3, 2013
2. "Trainer Records Kentucky Derby (1898-2016)". Kentucky Derby; visited February 2016

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Black Literature for Kids

Today's Black history moment is near and dear to my heart. If you know me personally, you know that I to read and I to write; in fact if you knew me in high school, you probably thought I'd go to school and major in English or Creative Writing and were shocked to find me in Math & Computer Science. Interestingly I abhor English classes--particularly American Lit.

It all stems from a very brief moment that had a very lasting impact on me as a young Black student. We were turning in our summer reading assignments and 4 people were complaining that they didn't understand Go Tell It On the Mountain by James Baldwin. It was one of the books we had the OPTION to read--I repeat, OPTION, as in they could have stopped at any point during the 3 months we had to do the assignment and chosen a different book. They wanted mercy from the teacher, whom I was confident was going to laugh. But she didn't laugh, or chastise them. She said they didn't understand the book because of "culture difference" and to my surprise, gave them a pass. From kindergarten through AP English I was REQUIRED to read exactly 4 books that were not written by or about white people. 3 were about Black people (deeply sorry for the Hispanics and the Native Americans that got 0 class time) and none of them occurred in American Lit. In American Lit we read Theme for English B (*rolls eyes* people there are other Black American writers, let cousin Langston breathe!--nah he's not my cousin but I'mma claim him anyway). That teacher told me something I witnessed first hand throughout school: Black literature wasn't important and it wasn't a requirement for students to understand Black culture or the Black experience, but it *was* important that I understand White literature, White culture, and the White experience.

My animosity towards English only grew over time, boiling over when our AP English teacher told me I read "too much Black literature" then tried to correct my critique of a White authors' portrayal of a Black Southern family (I mean, who am I to tell him what it's like to be Black and Southern, huh?) But if it weren't for Black literature I'd probably be illiterate or a physchopath; writers like Nikki Giovanni, Maya Angelou, Toni Morrison, Countee Cullen, etc. kept me sane! Truly though, it's Black children's book authors that deserve the credit, that's where my love of literature grew. I got to meet Eleanora E. Tate, my favorite author when I was a child. She autographed my favorite book, and encouraged me to keep writing and to keep reading. She provided an environment for people like me to fall in love with the story, to get immersed in the characters, to see myself from a Black lens instead of as the plot point or the magical negro or whatever other tired trope my English teachers subjected me to. Reading is fundamental, so it's crucial that at those early ages we have a voice in literature and are able to experience and appreciate it. I see Tiffany A. Flowers in my timeline constantly publishing and I'm proud to see that Black children's lit still has people dedicated to it. Perhaps if reading was diverse from early on we wouldn't retreat into these bubbles where we are unable to appreciate other cultures #ReadingIsImportant #WritingIsPowerful #BlackLitIsAmericanLitToo #MakeItCount #BlackHistoryMonth2016

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Home Ownership

Today I want to talk about Black home/land owners. I know from Facebook that a ton of you have just purchased homes so I'm not going to tag anyone specific, y'all know who you are. First off, congrats!😁 Second, i want to say why its a big deal and why I'm shouting out these people today. Owning land or a house is a big deal--it may not seem like a big deal, but it is. You see one of the major benefits of owning a home is that you can use it for collateral. Also, if you've strategically purchased your house and kept it up to date you can make money off of it. This is also a legacy factor. When you leave this world, your children inherit what you've accumulated. They can keep the land/home and continue the legacy or use it to jump start their own purchases. This provides opportunities to borrow money, to make money, to have a place of your own... Below is an article about Black homeownership and the hardship Black homeowners face in comparison to White homeowners. Hopefully, one day that gap won't be so large. Sidenote: did you know the first Black man to own land (and a home) in the territory that would become the US was Anthony Johnson sometime between 1625 and 1640 (unfortunately he was a slave owner too)? #BlackOwnership #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Rowan Huevel

References

1. Dorthy Brown. "How Home Ownership Keeps Blacks Poorer Than Whites". Forbes. December 10, 2012
2. "Anthony Johnson". PBS; visited February 2016
3. Deborah McNally. "Johnson, Anthony (? – 1670)". Black Past; visited February 2016

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Black Art

Today in Black History: Art is the world that stimulates our senses, there's visual art for the eyes, music and spoken word for the ears, culinary art for taste... In the US, visual art is mostly "White art" the models are white, the painters are white, the designers are white. That probably explain why minorities don't see themselves reflected as standards of beauty too often in the art world. But there are tons of Black artists--i know because my parents have stacked our house with Black art and African art; this meant I grew up seeing beauty from a Black perspective not a Euro-centric perspective. So today I'm shouting out the Black artists in my timeline. I've been admiring Rachel Burroughs Johnson's artwork since we were in like 3rd grade! I imagine when I get a house I will be trying to buy a Rachel original masterpiece for my living room.😁 Eboni Colbert and her mom Patricia Colbert are also known to put some beauty on paper or canvas (Pat is also working some art magic on hair and we all know Black hair is one of the most widely used canvases for art in our community). Jordan H. Manigo is a graphic designer--I've seen tons of awesome art pop up on his facebook page. No doubt if I was to create a startup, this is the guy I would call for logo design. Loren Chestnut is rocking out the world of calligraphy; if you have a fancy occasion she's definitely the person to check with. We're a stronger community when we support each other, but we're also a stronger community when our ideals of beauty are reflected in art. It doesn't have be that the artist is only painting African ideals, but simply that they are in the position to effect the art (probably would have been good if Sony had a black person there when they created that white/black psp ad 😑). #BlackArtistsAreFabulous #SupportOurCommunity #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Dad's Are Awesome

Since today is my dad's birthday, it seems only right to make him the spotlight for today. My dad was born in 1950 and is the youngest of 5. His senior year in high school ('67-'68) is the year integration began in my hometown of Conway, SC. That year black students were given the choice to attend the all white high school; only 5 people took the risk and my dad was one of those 5. My dad's original high school (the one for Blacks) would become the namesake for Whittemore Park Middle and Conway High School would go on to adapt its colors to add the gold from Whittemore High School. (Had they not built Carolina Forest, I would have attended Whittemore Park and graduated from Conway High). My dad went to South Carolina State University for 2 years, before transferring and graduating from Tennessee State University with a double major in Biology and Chemistry. After deciding he didn't like working in a lab, my dad went back to the University of South Carolina (house divided y'all) to get a Masters in Education and began working at a technical college. During his tenure there he was apart of the access & equity committee and oversaw summer programs for "at risk" and low-income children (and me, because I always tagged along). Now that he is retired he still works with a summer food program to provide lunches for non-profit summer camps in the community. Growing up people called me my dad's shadow. I can thank my dad for the ability to wake up at the crack of dawn because I learned early on that if I wanted to follow him all day I had to be up before the sun. While my dad gave/gives a lot to the community, he's still makes time to be a crazy awesome dad. I remember in 6th grade, I really wanted to go on this ski trip the school was offering, but my parents didn't want me to go unless one of them went too. My mom couldn't get off so it was on my dad, but my uncle had gotten super bowl tickets and the trip was super bowl weekend, so I was pretty sure I wasn't going to get to go. But my dad said there would be other super bowls, and took me skiing (best trip ever!) My dad is the one that doesn't mind that I called him on Skype to have him watch me drilling holes in boards to tell me why they aren't lining up—and bring me a new set of power tools when he comes to visit. My dad grew up during the civil rights movement, he attended all black schools, he is successful. He taught me 2 things in life: "You always have a choice, just remember you have to live with the consequence of that choice" and "You may have to be 3 times better to get what you deserve, but be 3 times better because you can be." #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount #MyDadIsAwesome #Happy66thBirthdayDad

Photocredit: ShutterStock.com/Flashon Studio

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Interracial Dating

Since today is valentines day i thought today's post should be in honor of Loving v. Virginia (if that doesn't ring a bell, google is your friend). Despite not being legal until 1967 (I don't know about y'all but that's around the time my parents were in high school), interracial relationships have had a major impact on the Black community. Rich cultures like the Creole in Louisiana were born from such occurrences. As many times as I've said "I'm not mixed"--as in I'm not biracial--even I know that there's no way I came out looking like me without a white person in the mix some where back there. Not only did these types of forbidden relationships shape the diversity in the appearance of Blacks (which isn't saying much I guess since African's already have the most diversity within our DNA anyway), but inter-personal relationships is what makes people realize the stupidity of racism. One of my favorite movies is Belle, because it shows just that. Belle, the daughter of an African slave and an Englishman, is taken to England after the death of her mother to live with her great-uncle who is the Chief Justice in England. While no one can say what would have happened had he not been raising a half-black child like a daughter, he would go on to make several rulings that helped to ban the atlantic slave trade. Today, interracial couples are exceedingly more common. Multiracial births are growing at the fastest rate in America--18 years from now America is going to be a lot less segregated simply because people aren't going to be Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, or whatever, they're going to be a couple of these all at once. Even today if you were to attend a family reunion with my family, you'd find people from every race (possibly why I never thought anything of people having different skin tones). So today my spotlight is on those of you celebrating valentines day with someone from a different race and those of you who get frustrated when they tell you to "choose one" box under race--it's way too many of you to tag! #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount #MulticulturalLove #LoveByContentNotColor

Photocredit: Shutterstock/Monkey Business Images

References

1. Theodore R. Johnson III. "When One Of New York's Glitterati Married A 'Quadroon'". Code Switch. June 7, 2014

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Trendsetters

Today I want to talk about trendsetters. The world often tries to put labels on what it means to be Black, but I've got a lot of friends stepping out of boxes. The first person I remember stepping out of the box is the sister of my friend Allegra Herring. Though I never really talked to Allegra's sister, I remember seeing her in the halls; she stood out as the only Black girl who rocked a punk/alternative/goth style. I admired her willingness to be herself (especially in high school). In college, Tasha Edwards was the first in my circle to take on the big chop and go natural. By the time I decided to go natural so many of my friends had already journeyed down that road, I had plenty of people to turn to for advice and support. Tasha on the other hand struck out on her own. She also has a fabulous vegan vlog (https://www.youtube.com/user/TheSweetestVegan). After college I met Jackie Alexander, among leading student media, Jackie is an outspoken feminist. I enjoyed watching her step into the world of motherhood because she did what she thought was best for her daughter, not was necessarily "normal." These three women aren't afraid to stand out or try something different to figure out who they are and that's always something to admire. #BeATrendsetter #DoYou #MakeItCount #BlackHistory2016

ShutterStock.com/Djomas

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Experiencing Racism

Today's moment of Black History comes with a video! Be sure to watch it here before continuing on. (Sorry, since it's not mine and I can't find it on YouTube, I'm not sure how to embed it here).

Some Perspective of Racism

I learned I was Black when I was 4. The person who told me was a white girl whose mother worked with my dad. I had grown up attending preschool with the same kids whom I would eventually graduate from high school (and one in college) with. Except for me and one other girl, they were all white but it NEVER occurred to me that this was odd. I NEVER asked my parents *why* they were a different color. I NEVER asked why they had blue eyes or green eyes or blonde hair or red hair. I understood that they were people just like I was a person and that people come in a variety of shapes, sizes, and colors. But one day, this girl walked up to me and said "you're black and I'm white"--I took her literally and showed her crayons in the coloring box to prove that I was not black and she was not white, more like tumbleweed vs. peach, but she insisted she was white and I, black. To this day, I have no idea why she felt the need to tell me I was black...

From there it went from white people telling me I was black to white kids calling me the n-word or suggesting I "could pass" (um...if you look at me and can't tell I'm black you need to see your eye doctor) or saying I "was different and not really black" as though it was to be a compliment.

In the video shared above, two of the ladies ignore everything to argue that racism can be felt by everyone and that everyone experiences discrimination. However, even if everyone experiences discrimination, it doesn't make it right—stereotyping a bald, tatted, white guy as a skinhead is wrong, just as stereotyping a black man as a thug is wrong. One does not justify the other. The major points they are missing is how often, where, and why. Sure, we all conform to get a job, but there's a huge difference in trimming your beard or wearing clothes you wouldn't normally wear and using lye—the harsh chemical found in relaxers that not only causes hair loss but has been linked to the increased rate of fibroids in black women^[2]—to make your hair "acceptable" or lying about your name because its "too black" or simply failing to conform because you can't change the color of your skin. They miss the fact that it is completely possible to avoid minorities who have racist attitudes towards whites. I met a white girl who at 22 years old had never had a conversation with a black person until the internship company placed us in the same apartment. There were 4 of us in that apartment and I was the only black person. Had I said racist things, she still had 2 allies. When she said racist things (which she did), I was alone—as always—even the people I worked for were all white. That is why when the conversation starts about racism, it is discussed from the point of view that a white person perpetuated the act. Minorities (black, hispanic, asian, whatever) are just that, minorities; in most situations we cannot escape the person who is racist towards us because they are our teacher, the boss, the store owner, the police officer, and just as all of the whites sitting around this woman nodded or stayed silent, no one is jumping up to be our ally or reassure us that they don't agree with that person. They're saying *shrug* it happens or it's in your head. The lady who said it's about more than black and white was correct. It's also about power, about money, and about options, three things minorities are are much less likely to have. #BeAnAlly #BlackHistory2016 #MakeItCount #ListenToThoseAroundYou

References

1. "Are Racist People in Denial". via Facebook. January 7, 2016
2. Lauren A. Wise, Julie R. Palmer, David Reich, Yvette C. Cozier, and Lynn Rosenberg. "Hair Relaxer Use and Risk of Uterine Leiomyomata in African-American Women". American Journal of Epidemiology. January 10, 2012

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Black Professors Are Important For Success

Yesterday, I talked about teachers, primarily in terms of grade school, but Black professors on the college level are important too. So, today I want to talk about 2 of my friends that are professors: Dr. Christan Grant and Dr. Walt Lee. I met Christan when I first started my own degree and he was finishing up his at the University of Florida. At the time we were the only Black people in the CISE PhD program (I only met 1 other Black person in the graduate department and no professors). The time I spent in that program was probably the most influential on my current view of race and culture, because most of the time I was the only black person, the only female, *and* the only American in the class... But Christan kept me sane and was way more helpful than my advisor. Even after I graduated from UF and moved on to complete my degree Christan will check in and always has the best advice. Christan who was the first Black person to earn a PhD from the CISE department in the past 20-30 years (not sure of the exact number) [EDIT: apparently there are some other Black graduates on record that we never saw/met] is now a professor at the University of Oklahoma. I met Walt in undergrad at Clemson; we started the PhD journey at the same time. Walt is/was my venting buddy. Now he is a professor in the engineering department at Virginia Tech and researches diversity and student support/retention in STEM. Thanks to people like them, people coming into school will be less likely to experience alienation at the college level. The more Black professors the more inspired the youth, the more our perspective is incorporated on the college level, the more Black graduate students, and the more support for our community. #MakeItCount #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #BlackProfessors #CallMeDr

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Faustin Tuyambaze

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Black Teachers in K-12

When I was in 4th or 5th grade (pardon my uncertainty, it's been a minute lol) my friends and I all tried out for a play. They all received a part, but I did not. It's weird that something you don't really care about suddenly becomes important when you're the only one not "in." I remember we found out just before lunch, so while they all celebrated and cheered, I was just kind of there... I remember bending down to tie my shoe, but then I didn't stand back up because it was easier to sit on the floor pretending to tie my shoe than to pretend I didn't feel left out. Luckily for me, my cousin Valeria Colbert Evans was a teacher at my elementary school and saw what was happening. She got me on my feet, took me to the side and reassured me it wasn't the end of the world. As a black person who has attended predominately white schools my whole life and only had 4 black teachers from preschool (age 6 weeks) all the way up through my PhD, I can tell you there is nothing more reassuring than a black face in a white space. I see movies like The Great Debaters and I think it would have been great to learn in an environment of black pride, where Black history is common knowledge. Mrs. Evans (well back then it was Ms. Colbert lol), Ms. Wilson, Ms. Dent, Ms. Sarvis (shout out to Ms. Sarvis for keeping it real in American Gov't and cutting down the boy who wouldn't refrain from racist remarks--i won't be petty and tag him), they were the glimmer of hope for me and the reminder that not *every* card was stacked against me. Teachers are probably the most important people we get the pleasure of interacting with and our history will never make it into the classroom without black teachers. People like Mary McLeod Bethune knew the power of black educators and black education, and I'm glad there are still people fighting for us from inside the classroom. If you're a teacher I applaud you; if you're a black teacher, I salute you and I'm hugging you from a distance. #TeachersMakeTheWorldGoRound #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Element5 Digital

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: In Service of Our Country

I always wondered if one of my ancestors fought in the revolutionary war... Blacks have been fighting for freedom for America (and against, in the case of those who fought with Britain) since before Blacks even had freedom for themselves. I can't trace my family that far back, but I do have family and friends that have fought in wars. My great-uncle Harrison Hughes and great-grandfather Ike Jackson were veterans of WWII. The deacon of my childhood church, Dea. Bethea Galloway was also veteran of WWII. My uncle Wilbur Bratcher was a veteran of the Korean war. My uncle, George Gaines is a veteran of the Vietnam war. My other uncle, Col. William Hughes is a veteran of the gulf war. Today, many of our generation are also fighting for us. My soror Danyelle Peterson is currently deployed and my friend Capt. De'Shawn Smith was previously deployed. Even more friends and family have served or are serving our country as well. These people risked their lives for a country that was never willing to even acknowledge or include them. #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #BlackSoldiers #MakeItCount

Photocredit: Unsplash.com/Andrew Ruiz

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: PEER at Clemson

The next 2 ladies I want to talk about are Serita Acker and Sue Lasser. Many of us who graduated from Clemson can say we wouldn't be where we are today without these two ladies, the current and past directors of PEER at Clemson. I was first introduced to Ms. Acker when I was in 8th grade and attended a week long summer camp hosted by WISE. I had never thought about engineering or Clemson before that and would likely have never ended up at Clemson in the college of engineering had I never attended that program. I would meet Ms. Acker again when I was a senior in high school for WISE Choice--a program that allowed high school girls to spend a few days at Clemson with a buddy/mentor as a preview of college life. While I was at Clemson Ms. Acker was over WISE, a program to promote women in engineering, now she is the director of PEER which is meant to aid and promote all minorities in engineering fields. Once at Clemson, I met Mrs. Lasser. Though she isn't Black, I'm sure she's touched, inspired, and motivated 99% (maybe even 100%) of the Black engineers who attended Clemson. Mrs. Lasser has convinced so many of us to pursue higher goals and dreams than we would have imagined for ourselves; she truly is a driving force behind Clemson Black Engineers setting out for PhDs, Masters, internships, etc. If it weren't for Ms. Acker, I may have never found my way to STEM or to Clemson, and if it weren't for Mrs. Lasser, I may have never found myself in graduate school---and I know I'm not the only one who can say that. While both women have been instrumental in helping people from many races, I think their effect on the Black community in Clemson is immeasurable. Black History is not just about the past, but the future. Thanks to these two, we are creating of future filled with successful Black PhDs, successful Black engineers, successful women, successful Hispanic engineers and successful Hispanic PhDs. That's monumental! #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #MakeItCount #YouDontHaveToBeBlackToMakeADifference

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Black Entrepenuership

Speaking of entrepreneurs, today I want to talk about some contemporary entrepreneurs: Harold Hughes & Steven Hughes. I met these two brothers at Clemson (no we aren't related); by the time I started school both of them were leaders on campus. In the era where too many college students are graduating and unable to find a job, or graduating buried in student debt, these two stand out. Steven started Know Money Inc to promote financial literacy and help stop generational poverty. Harold started Bandwagon, an organization to aid in purchasing sports tickets. These two are proving that Black entrepreneurship is not a thing of the past but a continuing legacy. #MakeItCount #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #BlackEntrepreneurs

Photocredit: ShutterStock.com/ARENA Creative

References

1. Steven Hughes. Know Money, Inc.; visited February 2016
2. Harold Hughes. Bandwagon; visited February 2016

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: The Family CEO

Today's #BlackHistoryMonth2016 post is about my aunt: Liz Bellamy. My aunt is the middle child on my dad's side and the family entrepreneur. She was also the first computer scientist in the family! 😁 Like the rest of my aunts and uncles, she went to school during segregation, and graduated from Durham Business College. My aunt has owned a few different business and several properties which she leased. Eventually she settled on owning and running Color Tile & Carpet with a friend (also a Black woman #BlackWomenEntrepreneurs). Not only is she a successful business owner but she raised 2 daughters—I also followed them around when I was a little girl—who also went on to be successful in the medical field. My cousins and I used to follow her around, playing in jewelry, and learning to do our hair. She made sure I knew that real women aren't just pretty or good at cooking and cleaning, but they handle business. #MakeItCount #MyFamilyTaughtMeBlackAndProud

Photocredit: ShutterStock.com/Miles Studio

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Role Models Pt. 2

Yesterday I talked about female role models, but we learn and take shape from both genders. Also, since there are people in America who think all Black men are violent thugged out criminals, I thought it was important to share the gentlemen who I saw as role models when they were in their teens and I was a young girl: Tony Gaines & Brett Gaines. Possibly because I was a tom boy growing up, I always wanted an older brother—I don't have any brothers though, so I ended up looking up to my older cousins. Whenever they played games nearby, or whenever my parents were willing to drive lol, I'd go see them play. Mostly basketball, sometimes football. And I just knew i was gonna get taller and be a great basketball player too. I didn't have to look up to Shaq & Kobe because I could look up to Tony & Brett. When I finally did try out for a basketball team, I wasn't in the best shape, so after the 2nd day of tryouts I couldn't really walk lol. I was upset and disappointed, but no matter what my parents said I was still upset; so my mom called these two to talk some sense into me. I'm sure they had homework, friends, and much cooler things to do that to talk to a little kid about basketball tryouts, but they took the time to reassure me that it was perfectly normal and to tell me I couldn't quit. We have a no quitting policy in my family! I may not have ever ended up playing basketball (or grown any taller -_-), but I learned about committing to a challenge, sportsmanship, and perseverance from these two, and these lessons apply to everything you do in life. They reminded me that you have to go through some pain to achieve your goal, that you always have to strive for your own best, then keep pushing yourself to be better. Both of them recently welcomed into the world daughters, whom I have no doubt will be daddy's girls :) For those of you who for some reason don't already understand this, just because a Black man is tall, big, athletic...Black lol, doesn't mean he's a thug, he may be the best role model out there. And for those of you who are Black men, you probably have little brothers, maybe even sisters, who are looking at you the same way I looked at those two. You're setting the example of how to survive as a Black man in this world. So #MakeItCount #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #TeensMakeDifferencesToo #AllMyRoleModelsWereReal

Photocredit: ShutterStock/Volt Collection

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Role Models

Today I want to talk about role models. Lots of little girls want to be like Beyonce or Kim K., people with impossible attributes, who don't even know they exist, but there are always great role models within our communities. For me some of those girls (I'd be posting forever if I named them all) were GeFranya Matrulia Graham, Shakira Brockington, and Faith Smith-Wilson. I remember GeFran telling me what it was like to be in high school, helping me with my homework, and grounding me with the knowledge that one fateful day, I would get a B, maybe even a C, but that wouldn't make me less smart; it just meant I'd have to study harder. Shakira, who I'd eventually be in band with, inspired me to work harder and to not give up on music. I remember being so excited when she was on homecoming court (it wasn't often you saw a Black person on homecoming court and a fellow band geek at that!). Faith, my older cousin, let us sit with her and her friends on the bus, despite the fact that we were lowly 6th graders and they were Juniors or Seniors in high school. She was almost like an older sister, filling us in on what the next few years would be like. It's no surprise to me that they're still out accomplishing wonderful things. These ladies all helped me grow, be confident, and appreciate myself. Even as teenagers, possibly without even knowing it, they were making an impact on the generation below them. Your little sisters, cousins, the girl down the road, they may not say it, but they look up to you. What you do, they will do, because while Mrs. Obama or Beyonce may seem impossibly cool, you are real and tangible--a blueprint to success. What has always made our community great is the passing of greatness from one generation to the next, and that can start even in your teens so #MakeItCount #BlackHistoryMonth2016 #TeensMakeADifferentToo #PassDownWhatYouKnow #BlackWomenEmpoweringBlackWomen

Photocredit: ShutterStock/Samuel Borges Photography

Real Experiences for BHM 2016: Music Gurus

The next set of heroes I want to talk about are one set of my maternal grandparents (that's a long story, just go with it): Leslie McIver, Sr. and Mary-Ann McIver. They were born a little later than may paternal grandparents, but still during the Jim Crow South. They met while attending Claflin University—1 of 4 of the only schools in South Carolina that accepted Blacks at the time. While at Claflin, my grandfather became a member of Alpha Phi Alpha Fraternity, Inc. and my grandmother a member of Zeta Phi Beta Sorority, Inc. After graduating, both of them began teaching music. My grandfather would go on to become a local legend as a great high school band director. My own high school band director would often bring up this fact and eventually convinced my grandfather to conduct one of the band practices for my high school (while I was still in school). My grandmother continued teaching piano lessons even after retirement, becoming the go-to person for Black children in the community who wanted to learn music. Perhaps this is why I learned to read music while I learned to read words. On top of being great musicians, both were heavily involved in serving the community. Every time I walk into their house, I am greeted by a wall of awards for their service to our community—not a community far away or that I've heard of, but the one I lived in. One little known service that they did was encourage and facilitate the formation of the first integrated United Methodist Church in my hometown. They would later be ordained as Deacons in the Methodist Church. Again, during an era where black people were not afforded many rights, my grandparents were out paving the way for future generations and doing great things. Also, growing up in an era where women were supposed to stay in the kitchen, my grandmother completed both high school and college, taught, and was ordained. They would go on to raise 4 kids, all of whom turned out to be successful, involved with their community and all around great people. ‪#‎BlackHistoryMonth2016‬ ‪#‎OhSnapWeGet29Days‬ ‪#‎MakeItCount‬ ‪#‎BeatTheOdds‬